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View Full Version : You don't have to read this, I'm just getting a bit of weight off my shoulders.



Thumper
02-05-2015, 09:42 AM
I haven't been around much this week and won't be here the rest of the day after I make this post. My Mom's 83rd birthday was Tuesday and my sis & BIL have been in town all week from Texas. I rescue my BIL every morning and we take off for the day just to get away from the drama. But, now to the real reason for this post.

You all know my stance when it comes to religion, so I don't even need to go there, but I have never discussed Lynn's feelings here. Believe it or not, we never ... or very, VERY seldom discuss religion, because it usually doesn't end well ... just like this place ... or anywhere else for that matter when two opposing views on religion are discussed. Much like politics in a lot of ways.

For a little background, Lynns great-grandparents were Buddhist. Frankly, if I were ever FORCED to make a decision on my beliefs, I'd lean that way myself as I've studied it and consider it more of a "way of life" than an actual "religion". But, again, this is NOT about me. Lynn's grand-parents came over here in the 30's or 40's and were actually Catholic. I'm not sure if they "converted" in Japan or after they arrived in the U.S. They were not "church goers", but were "believers" and followed the basic church doctrines for the most part. But ... from MY personal observations, I could see Catholicism mixed in with a bit of Buddhism ... but, that said, they didn't eat meat on Fridays! ;)

Lynn's mom (I never knew her dad) grew up Catholic ... again, not a "church goer" ... but it is the religion she grew up with. Lynn prays in a whisper anytime there's a crisis of some sort ... I mean, if someone is "hurting", she whispers a little "prayer" for them. If we so much as see road kill on the side of the highway ... I don't care if it's a skunk ... she whispers a little prayer. She believes in God ... or DID anyway ... until last night. (that's the subject of this post, I'll elaborate later) To be honest, I've never described her as "religious" ... I've always looked at her as "spiritual". I don't want to get into a tired old argument on the difference ... it would be like the years I've spent here arguing the difference between "Atheist" and "Agnostic". You're going to think what you want and it's not going to change, so take it for what it's worth.

Ok, with that brief background out of the way, here's the subject of this post. Last night Lynn got out of the shower and was crying like a baby. I don't mean minor whimpering, she was BAWLING ... almost uncontrollably ... actually shaking. I had no frigging clue what was going on. Did she get news her mom passed away and she didn't tell me? It seemed that serious. I held her and finally calmed her down a bit, then her sadness turned to bitterness. (I'm still at a loss and totally clueless, but thought she was having some sort of emotional meltdown). Then she blurted out, "You've been right all along ... there is no f'ing God!" .... then returned to crying uncontrollably. Ok, by now I'm ready to call the men in the white coats, but sat and held her until she calmed down again.

After the dust settled, I asked her WTF was going on? Evidently this Middle East b/s has been eating at her. Note: We NEVER discuss politics ... remember, she was born and raised in California! So basically, we avoid the two major no-no's ... religion and politics. After some discussion and my questioning about the God comment, we got to the bottom of what sent her off the deep end. When those ISIS a-holes burned that Jordanian pilot ... it was evidently "the straw that broke the camel's back". When that happened, she cracked ... she'd had her fill and lost all faith in God. In her words, God would never let this happen ... He allows so much evil ... why? Heck, I had no answers ... I've been seeking an answer to questions like that all my life. We didn't really discuss religion or God after that, I simply tried to calm her down a bit so she could get some sleep ... but she cried herself to sleep.

She just left for work after trying to hide her puffy eyes with make-up. This morning, we didn't discuss much ... she awoke pissed off. Her sadness has turned to anger ... with God and the world in general. I've been with her for 30 years and this is only the second time I've ever seen her this distraught. She lost her God last night.

I'm not really asking advice ... the tired old "God works in mysterious ways" b/s has never helped. I just don't know where this is leading. To be honest, she's almost so far over the edge I'm thinking seriously about taking her to a doctor if she doesn't calm down today. This is SOOOO NOT like her. She used to find "peace in God" ... I honestly hate to see that go away, but she seems to have her mind made up. I'm not sure what to do. Hopefully things will better by tonight.

The odd thing is, what pushed her over the edge is just the news reports ... simply words. She has never seen ... and I hope she never does, (she would never watch it anyway) the video. This is extremely graphic, but if you're so inclined (and want to get pissed off) you can watch this. If you don't want to sit through all the un-translated b/s ... you can scan up to about the 17 minute mark for the "execution". These people are worse than animals ... the scum of the earth.

http://video.foxnews.com/v/4030583977001/warning-extremely-graphic-video-isis-burns-hostage-alive/#sp=show-clips

BarryBobPosthole
02-05-2015, 10:06 AM
Faith in 'something' is a genuine human need. Its a hole that almost has to be filled with something. It connects us to our universe and grounds us. You yourself have faith in something, whether you want to admit it or not. It might not be religious faith, but I think you get my meaning. You have faith the sun will come up tomorrow and that is based on either thinking its because a giant bird will poop it out when he wakes up and flies across the sky or maybe its because you believe in the laws of physics but something gives you confidence, or faith, that it'll happen. That faith, and it doesn't matter much what we believe IMO, is what makes us work, and take care of families and each other, and its why we save food against another day so we can eat and so forth. All because we have faith that tomorrow will come. Sometime some asshole or group of assholes shakes our faith and makes it seem like no matter what, the bad guys have won. They haven't.

Give her time. Real people of faith almost always find their strength again.

BKB

Buckrub
02-05-2015, 10:18 AM
She's not alone.

Life's full of questions. I wish I knew for a fact the answers. All I have is what I believe, and what I believe is based on thought, contemplation, study, and logic (believe it or not).

I do NOT believe "everything happens for a reason". And if I believed God was in such total control that it's his fault that such atrocities happen, then I'd have to say he's also responsible for putting fish on my line, or letting me shoot a deer. But if so, why does he like Ed or Cappy better'n me? Thus, I can't buy that he's in such total control now. I do think this is HIS world, and HIS laws that run it, but I have to believe man is a free moral agent to do whatever he wants. And some of 'us' want stuff that's evil, and no, I don't know why that is. God either controls every step of everyone at all times, or he controls none of us ever. Any middle ground is unthinkable to me. I conclude he built it, set it in motion, and left it to us.........and will judge us on how we did. That's BILL'S view only.

And that's how I can sleep at night, even a little bit, with the world I have known for 66 years crumbling all around me.

Not much help, sorry. Best I got.

Big Muddy
02-05-2015, 10:25 AM
Phole hit the nail-on-the-head.

"""Give her time. Real people of faith almost always find their strength again."""

Niner
02-05-2015, 10:52 AM
There's been "bad people/things" on this earth since day one. Just in the last half of the 20th century look at some of the badness there was.... Hitler, Stalin, Lenon, The A-bomb, Communism in general, Pol Pot, Idi Amin, The Dust Bowl, The Great Depression, Mt. Saint Helens, The Unibomber .......and that's just off the top of my head. There's been a constant stuggle of good vs evil on this planet ever since ever....these terrorist A-holes are just the latest iteration of evil

Captain
02-05-2015, 11:58 AM
Thumper if your " key ever breaks you will not be able to post! 😜

Big Skyz
02-05-2015, 02:05 PM
Jim, you know me well enough to know I usually don't say much about things like this, or hang myself out on a limb. So please respect what I have to say even if you do not agree. I'm not posting this for debate, just as my understanding of how things work.

There is no mysterious ways about it. You do realize we were sent to this earth and provided with free agency. Satan wanted to remove that free agency and have us all be subject to his will and his glory. That is the offer he made to God. Christ offered man free agency and took upon himself all or our sins. That includes everyone, even those ISIS scumbags. However, that does not mean they are forgiven. What it does mean is that man has his free agency to choose between good and evil. God is not going to suddenly remove that free agency just because there is an extremely vile faction in the middle east, Africa, or even in downtown New York. The free agency is there, but the consequences for one's choices is there as well. While man can repent and receive forgiveness, murder is not forgivable. As to whether killing someone (especially in times of war) is murder or not, I will leave that up to God to sort out. I personally have no problem in killing another person in defense of my family, freedom, or my country. I for one am glad I have the free agency to choose and that I'm not forced to bend to anyone else's beliefs. I have seen the video of the burning pilot. It is graphic and upsetting, but I do not hold any malice towards God for it, nor do I expect him to suddenly swoop in and bring everything in the middle east to a sudden halt. I do not expect it anymore than I expect him to cause every rapist, child molester, or murderer to suddenly fall over dead on the planet. To me Satan and God are very real and both are very powerful. We all have the free agency to choose between good and evil. Unfortunately there are those that will gravitate towards evil. Whether in this life or the next we will all have to answer for the choices we have made.

Big Muddy
02-05-2015, 02:35 PM
Sky, that is so ironic....at my church, we just got thru studying, your similar explanation....it was entitled "God's Free Will"....pastor explained God's three agencies/wills:

1. HIS Decisive Will - HE can impose HIS own will upon each individual
2. HIS Permissive Will - right or wrong, HE allows everyone the free will to make their own decisions
3. HIS Corrective or Over-ruling Will - HE allows everyone to make their own decisions, but corrects them, IF it is HIS will to do so.

Ha, I get "corrected" a lot ;)

Big Skyz
02-05-2015, 02:59 PM
Big Muddy, so do I brother, SO DO I!

DeputyDog
02-05-2015, 09:24 PM
Like I said in the American Sniper post last week or when ever it was, I believe that God gave man free will to do whatever they want, good or bad. However, man will be judged on their choices when they die.

There are too many evil things that go on in this world to mention, that in my belief, if God controlled everything man did, would never happen.

Thump, as for Lynn, if her faith is a big part of her life, even though she wasn't a church goer as you put it, you may as her if she would like to talk with a priest about her feelings about God. Maybe he could help her to understand why God lets bad things happen.

Thumper
02-05-2015, 10:03 PM
Thanks a bunch guys. I went to see her at work today and it was "business as usual", so she seemed to be holding up ok. Prob. is, she came home from work, said she was tired (didn't sleep well last night) and went to bed. Dang! I think I'll go check on her and see if she might want to get up and fix me some supper. :D

Seriously, thanks for the input ... I'm sure it'll all smooth over. She can get extremely emotional sometimes. She's a total basket case when one of her cats dies.

Captain
02-05-2015, 10:06 PM
Well toward the end of your post you say her sadness turned to anger toward God. So I assume she still believes in him.
No way she can say "you are right, there is no God" and then be mad at something she don't believe in?
Just hang in there with her a few days and let her sort it out. She's got to good a heart to turn against her beliefs.

Captain
02-05-2015, 10:07 PM
And fix your own supper..... And hers!!!

DeputyDog
02-05-2015, 10:22 PM
Yeah, what Cappy said!!

Thumper
02-05-2015, 11:03 PM
What??? I don't want to SPOIL her! Sheesh!

BarryBobPosthole
02-05-2015, 11:19 PM
I had some similar feelings to hers here a little while back when my Uncle and lifetime friend died of cancer at 63. It just seems like assholes live to 90 and the good guys have to suffer. So just because there's a loving God, there ain't necessarily no justice. That'd be too fucking much to ask. So see, I can go there easily. It pisses me off to see good people suffer.

Anyway, I like a quote from old Captain Call in Lonesome Dove that stuck with me the first time I read it. It goes something like "The best way to deal with death is to walk away from it." i always thought that summed it up pretty good.

BKB

Cards01
02-06-2015, 08:49 AM
that was right after the snakes got the 1 Irish boy crossing the river