Talk about dumbassery!

[Thumper]

Since Bucky is on a hiatus from posting any bonehead things he does, I guess I'll have to step in and pick up a bit of the slack.

During my MANY surgeries a few years back, some blood flow was blocked (or restricted) which is one reason my back took so long to heal (lack of blood flow) and my feet have been numb ever since. I can "feel" them, but it's more of just a "tingle" than anything else ... much like when your hand/foot/whatever is "asleep".

Well, a couple nights ago one of my toenails was split and kept catching on the bedspread. It was driving me nuts, so I sat up on the side of the bed to get the toenail clippers and give it a little trim. I didn't want to wake Lynn by turning the light on, but the tv was on so I could see pretty well. I reached over where we "always" keep the clippers, but they were not there. It's a common problem in this household, I'm very anal about stuff like that and always put everything back in the same place at all times. Lynn puts things wherever she used them last. Anyway, no clippers, but the scissors were there so I trimmed my raggedy nail with the scissors. I then rubbed the end of my toe with my finger to make sure I got rid of the snag. All I felt was wetness!

WTF? I walked into the bathroom, flipped on the light and I swear it looked like 2 gallons of blood on the floor! I looked down and my toe was bleeding profusely! I'd cut the dang tip of my toe off!!! The fact I was standing and my foot was the lowest part of my body was bad enough, but add the fact I'm on blood thinners and you've got a mess on your hands ... or on the floor anyway. To make matters even worse, there was a massive trail of blood leading from the bed to the bathroom ... and we have light beige carpeting!

Arrrggghhh! Note to self ... no sensation in your feet is a good thing if you want to perform surgery, but it ain't good to play with sharp objects in the dark. I didn't feel a thing! It LOOKS pretty sore right now, but luckily I can't feel it. :(

[Chicken Dinner]

Dumbass!

[Big Skyz]

Good thing you aren't on blood thinner medication or you might not have had the opportunity to make this post...

[Hombre]

"but add the fact I'm on blood thinners and you've got a mess on your hands " I think Thump is...pretty lucky dufus better start being careful.

[Thumper]

Yeah, I should elaborate. I'm not on Warfarin/Coumadin or anything like that, but been on daily 81 mg. aspirin for the past bazillion years. It takes forever just to get a shaving nick to stop bleeding these days. Mosquitoes drown if they bite me. ;)

[Captain]

I'm sure Lynn was impressed with all the blood in the bed, sheets, mattress, carpet etc that had to be cleaned up. I'm also sure YOU spun it to be HER fault for not having the clippers in their "correct" spot.

[Big Muddy]

I agree with your self-assessment-----dumbassery!!!! ;)

[Nandy]

ouch!!!!!

[BarryBobPosthole]

Good thing you weren't trying to prick your boil!


Dumbass.

BKB

[Arty]

Good thing you weren't trying to prick your boil!


Dumbass.

BKB

Or boil your prick!

[Big Muddy]

.... or trying to circumcise yourself. ;)

[Big Muddy]

In all seriousness, Thump, I can sympathize with you....I think I mentioned it here many years ago, when I cut my thumb nearly plum off....my Dad rushed me to a specialist doc in Greenville, MS, and he sewed it back on.
The surgery worked, but left my thumb totally without any feeling in it to this day.
There's no telling how many times I've accidently run the cutting torch across it, without even knowing, until I smelled the burning flesh.

[HideHunter]

and I sympathize with the "other" problem. While my wife doesn't necessarily leave things "wherever she used them last", she "puts things away"... and never in the same place. Bugs the living shit out of me. :spank I've told my kids, if they ever get a report I've run screaming, naked and armed off into the country side - I finally "looked" for one too many things.. :happy :crazy

[Thumper]

Hidey-Ho, that's actually what I meant. Kitchen drawer, bathroom drawer, nightstand drawer. medicine cabinet ... who knows where it'll end up? Instead of leaving it in the same place at all times, it's "put away" in the closest drawer to where she used it last! Irritates the piss out'ta me.

Same with the fridge ... If she hasn't used it last ... I could walk into the kitchen in the middle of the night, turn on NO lights and even if the light in the fridge was burned out, I could reach right to the rack on the door and pretty much put my hand on the mayo. BUT ... if she was the last to use the mayo, it'll be on the bottom shelf in the very back to where I'd have to empty the whole frigging shelf to get to it. Of course, that's AFTER I've already emptied every frigging shelf above it to find it's not there! To make matters worse, there will be a big open space on the shelf on the door where the mayo USED to be!

Arrrrggghhhh! :pissed

[BarryBobPosthole]

That's kinda OCD.

BKB

[LJ3]

Bert called. He said you're a dumbass.

An OCD dumbass.

[Thumper]

That's kinda OCD. BKB

Maybe, but it sure make life easier if you know where things are! If I need a pair of Vise Grips, I know which drawer they're in in my tool box (which has elebenty-bazillion drawers), NOT laying on a shelf in my storage shed where I worked on the mower last. If I'm half bleeding to death and need a Band-Aid, I know the box is in the drawer to the left of the bathroom sink, NOT in the cabinet UNDER the sink all the way in the back where SOMEONE put them after using them last. Why keep fishing lures in a kitchen drawer and silverware in your tackle box? :D

[Captain]

Where the fun in life if everything is where you know it is....
OCD

[Thumper]

Well, if'n ya' gots ta' pee really, really badly. Wouldn't it be nice to know where to find your pecker? Maybe I AM OCD, I ALWAYS know mine will be dragging on the ground behind me. ;)