Tuesday funny ...

A 7 year old and a 6 year old are playing in the yard. The 7 year old said, "You know what? I think it's about time we started learning to cuss". Dad does it all the time. The 6 year old nods his head in approval.

The 7 year old continues, "When we go in for breakfast, I'm gonna say something with hell and you say something with ass".

The 6 year old agrees with enthusiasm.

When the mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 7 year old what he wants for breakfast, he replies,

"Aw, hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios".

WHACK!!!

He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear with every step. His mom locks him in his room and shouts, "You can stay there until I let you out!"

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 6 year old and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?"

"I don't know", he blubbers, "but you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios".. ;)

:laughing

Ha, reminds me of a picture show event from my childhood, and I may have already told it here, previously.....at Sat. matinees, my best buddy, Mackie (who was badly tongue-tied and cussed quite a bit), and I "sometimes" would sneak in early, thru the back door of the picture show, and hide out in the bathroom.....then, as the other "paying" kids came in the front door, we'd step out and innocently join the crowd.....the owner was a married philandering ladies man named Big Daddy, who hired a good-looking single lady named Stella to operate his food counter.....we were peeking out the crack of the door, when Big Daddy suddenly picked up Miss Stella, and sat her down, right on top of the food counter.....they began smooching, then Big Daddy lifted up her skirt, and they did the funky monkey, right there on the food counter.....after the deed was done, we sneaked out into the crowd, and got in the food line.
Then, as we approached the food counter, we watched Miss Stella lay out hot dog buns on the bare counter, and smeared them with either mayo, mustard, or ketchup.....Miss Stella looked down at Mackie, and asked him what he wanted to order.....Mackie peered down at the buns, which were lined up on the now "defiled" counter top, then looked up at Miss Stella, and in his best tongue-tied voice said, "Yoo tin bet yoor sweet azz I don wan no day'um hot dawg." ;)

Mayo on a hot dog. I have now officially heard it all.


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Ha, it's a Southern thing.....we put slaw on our bbq sammiches, too.....oh yeah, we love boilt peanuts, too. ;)

I'll hafta admit, following the funky monkey event, the mayo wasn't too appealing. ;)

I’m Southern and put slaw on my BBQ sandwich and like boiled peanuts. Hell, slaw is even good on a hot dog. But, straight Mayo? Ew.


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Quote:

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Originally Posted by Chicken Dinner

I’m Southern and put slaw on my BBQ sandwich and like boiled peanuts. Hell, slaw is even good on a hot dog. But, straight Mayo? Ew.

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I got's ta' agree with CD on this one. WTF???

I got grossed out in Europe when I ordered French Fries and ended up with fries and mayo!

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'Course I remember the first time I went up to Canuckia to go bear hunting. I stopped for lunch, ordered fries and they brought them to me smothered in brown gravy. Sheeesh, between Yankees trying to pass off Cream of Wheat as grits and Canucks serving fries with gravy ... I'll stick to Southern Cooking thank you very much! Oh, and I won't eat a BBQ pork sammich without coleslaw! First had it that way in Memphis and never looked back.