Scariest experiences in the woods?

[Captain]

I was black bear hunting with a bow near Clifton Maine one year. We were staying in a wall tent and had packed in our provisions for a week stay. Came down out of the stand one afternoon just at dark and started walking back to camp. I was not using a light as I was walking a cut out Powerline for about a mile. I walked up on top if a bear that jumped and "whoofed" at me from like 10 or 12 FEET. There I was with about a mile or so to go back to camp and all I had was a stick and string. Needless to say I got a little spring in my step and knocked an arrow. Not really sure that would have done me any good but it sure seemed like the right thing to do at the time.

[Thumper]

Ha ha! I hunted Ontario bear for many years ... so I keep recalling other stories. I guess bear hunting is spookier than hunting ducks or sumpin'.

I was on only my second bear hunt and had shot a bear. Right after the shot, he let out a loud growl and hauled ass into a thick, dark, swampy area. I sat in my blind for a few minutes and later heard another loud growl back in the swamp. Crap! I ain't goin' in there by myself! I walked back to the shoreline and pumped off a few shots to signal my buddy that I needed help. By time he left camp and got to me by boat, it was pretty dang dark in the bush. I told him what had happened and we proceeded into the swamp. I ain't gonna lie ... I was scared shitless as I knew there might be a super pissed off bear in that dang, dark and spooky swamp! I "thought" I made a good shot ... but then doubt started creeping in. BUT ... my buddy's balls were about 100 times bigger than mine at the time, so I stayed right with him (okay, maybe a few steps BEHIND him!). We found the bear and realized when he'd taken off ... he was "running dead". That last growl I'd heard was his "death growl".

Now we had a problem. We had a 300 lb. bear down in this swamp and had to carry him uphill to get out of there ... and still get him out to the boat and back to camp! We cut a sapling, tied his feet together and slipped the pole between his legs. My buddy took the lead and I took up the rear position. The problem was, the bear's head was on my end and hanging right between my legs. It was a bitch to walk all bow-legged trying to hold up all that weight with that bear's head between my legs, but we struggled on up the hill as best we could. Then we came to a downed tree and had to lift that big guy up and over the tree. My buddy got on the other side of the tree and lifted the front of the pole as high as possible, while I pushed from the rear. As we dragged the bear over that tree, I guess it forced out whatever air remained in his lungs and ... you guessed it ... it came out as a loud GROWL! Now remember, I have a big-assed bear's head between my legs ... with his mouth right on my ... ummm, "manhood" ... and he lets out a loud growl! Ok, ok ... so once again, I'm in the middle of the woods screaming like a little girl!

And yes ... the whole camp had a good laugh that night as my buddy just could NOT keep that story to himself!