There was this loving grandfather who always made a special effort to spend time with his son's family on weekends. Every Saturday morning he would take his 5-year-old granddaughter out for a drive in the car for breakfast and some quality time.

One particular Saturday, however, he had a terrible cold and felt he needed to stay in bed. To add to his misery, he knew his granddaughter always looked forward to their drives together and would be very disappointed. Fortunately, his wife came to the rescue and said she would take their granddaughter out for her weekly drive and breakfast.

When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather, who was still in bed.

"Well, did you enjoy your ride with Grandma?" he asked.

Not really, Papa, it was boring. We just drove around while Grandma smiled at everyone we saw. We didn't see a single asshole, queer, lesbian, piece of crap, horse's ass, socialist-left-wing-Obama-lover, blind bastard, dipshit, Muslim-camel-humper or son-of-a-bitch anywhere we went."